Garden

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A way of taking the 'wild' out of the 'wilderness'.

How to

  1. Find unclaimed wilderness
  2. Get tools -- scythe, spade & mattock, big stick, big dog
  3. Get peasants to do the work (use the big stick to encourage them)
  4. Have the taller grass etc removed
  5. Select those flowers and vegetables already there which you wish to keep
  6. Have the other vegetation (weeds) removed
  7. Tend what is left
  8. Have it guarded against predatory animals, birds, etc by peasants plus big dog
  9. Bring in plants and vegetables from elsewhere
  10. Plant them and tend them
  11. In your declining years sit and enjoy

Beware of

  • Rabbits, Badgers and other burrowing animals, after your vegetables
  • Deer, pigs, sheep, etc., also after your veg
  • Love-besotted swains who nick your blooms
  • Tax assessors, who will try to raise your taxes
  • Tourney organisers, who will thank you for clearing a space and then send their fighters to trample over all you have done [see big stick, big dog; also consider nether orifices (the organisers', not your own)]

See Also